Self Worth Re-build #1

Happy 2013,

I have made it my main 2013 goal to 'be more positive' in all aspects of my life. Starting now. 

So, over the past months i have realised that my self worth is at the bare minimum. I can pick out all my negatives that lasts sheets and sheets of paper and not be able to challenge any of the back with a positive. Therefore i rate myself a 1. on the 'how much i love myself' scale. This needs to change.

From my past posts, i have come clean and decided to take the almighty step of telling my family about the one thing that makes me happy in life, my relationship with Claire. This has led to me feeling a lot more comfortable and finally 'making it official' I quote that as it still scares me a little. But the main thing is, in the long run, i feel a lot more calm, comfortable and accepting to my choices. Most important i am happy with them, which has enabled me to move up on the 'how much i love myself' scale. Here i am, currently at a 3. (1 step for each action that i am happy with) 

After working on a big step, i am trying to build up some small steps that will all contribute to how much i love myself. I want to find that person that i know is in my shell somewhere, that real me, that i used to really enjoy and love every detail about. 

As it is #1, i want to start small and enable myself to start the day off with a smile. To do this i found 5 quotes (as i love quotes) that make my lips form the shape of a banana. It doesn't necessarily have to be quotes, maybe photos or even a video clip on your laptop, anything that brings you a smile and makes you feel for one second that everything will be ok. Loose yourself in a moment of happiness. 

I like quotes as i find them motivational, inspiring and comical. 

Here are mine, that lie deep within my recovery journal...

1. With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts - Eleanor Roosevelt

2. I feel sorry for people that dont drink, as when they wake up in the morning, thats as good as they're going to feel all day- Frank Sinatra

3. Always live in the ugliest house on the street- then you dont have to look at it.

4. Guilt, the gift that keeps on giving (this is for my sarcastic tendencies.)

5. Common sense and a sense of humour are the same thing, at different speeds. A sense of humour is just common sense dancing- William James. (I relate this to myself and try to believe it)

These are my only five, but i will continue to add more. I look at these when i feel down or just negative and without fail they always make me smile and enable me to begin to pick myself back up.

We all need a starting point, that one little thing that will get the ball rolling each time you find yourself in a bad place. For me, its to make myself smile. 

-Rachel.