(Taken from personal journal)
Year 11,(Age 16) I began to diet because I simply wanted to loose weight. Me and my friend Jenn, took on this challenge to loose weight together. We would count our daily calories in the dinner hall and plan our lunch meals, talk about our evening meals and make time for exercise. We started to run around the estate. The calorie counting didnt last too long, however as I wrote down the calories of the day in my notebook, I instantly felt the success of my daily challenge, my goal of eating under 1000 calories a day.
As time went on, meals would be stricter, at a minimum including only an apple and a drink for lunch. I remember the daily meal of a sandwich compiled with a slice of chicken on two slices of weight watchers bread. It was the thinnest, most pointless bread i've ever tried. Accompanied with a piece of fruit and a cereal bar for a snack. In the evening, the usual meal would be a bag of uncle ben's 2 minute microwaveable rice. After 18.00 I would eat nothing and only drink, water or a soda if I felt hungry.
Even though my friends called me skinny and said I looked 'ill' I didnt take any notice and didnt believe a word of it. To me I felt 'good' I was happy with my body and my new weight. I felt accomplishment and was proud.
Why should I feel guilty about wearing jeans that were too big for me?
My lowest weight was 6stone 12. Size 6 bottoms were too big for me and people started to comment on my weight loss. It made me angry because they were putting me down, when I felt so happy. I was underweight and my BMI was unhealthy but I didnt care, I liked my body and myself. It was only when the pain started to creep in. I remember the day that I noticed the bruising on my hips. I was in the toilet and remember the pain of my skirt brushing against my pelvic bones. I saw the bruising and it scared me. I dont like pain especially self inflicted. Its the one things that scares me about myself. That I can actually hurt myself.
Thats when I snapped out of my trance and gradually started to put on weight and eat normally again.
-Jayne Doe
-Jayne Doe
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