I have this issue that keeps on niggling at me and the topic never seems to go away.My GP wants me to have counselling, which i understand i need to meet them half way and phone up to make an appointment or better still answer their calls. I make up a phoney excuse every time my GP asks me if i have taken the plunge yet. And its niggling at me so much, i don't know if to keep on with my lame excuses or just tell her the truth.
Telling the truth swamps me with embarrassment and it just makes me feel pathetic that its something i feel so uneasy about doing yet its such a simple task. One situation in which my anxiety is at its all time high is when i have to talk on the phone. I have been like this all my life and i cant seem to get over the simple fear. I find it hard enough answering a phone call never mind making one. This is why i put it off all the time, i just get scared and freak out into a panic. Abort!
I feel stupid that i'm 21 years old and find it so difficult to make a simple 2 minute phone call. When push come to shove, i ask my girlfriend to ring up and pretend to be me, thats how suckish i get.
But maybe telling my GP the truth will help me out a little, take the niggle away and help her understand why i keep putting the counselling off. At first i just didn't want to talk about my problems, but now i cant talk in order to make an appointment. If i can get around that step, maybe i can push on in a better direction.
Truth it is then.
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